sydney on my mind

it is so freaking hot. expected because of the season, (summer that is) this year is the worst. i usually wake up with an excruciating headache and most often than not, have asthma in the sidelines. this is the time of the year that i wish i am in sydney, australia. its autumn there now. the temperature is just a little colder than baguio and you can smell the leaves. the air is so clean and the environment is friendly and amiable. it is the only place i've been that almost the people you meet on the streets greet you good day or bid you to have a nice day. this goes on public transport as well. aboard a bus, the driver always try to have a conversation and the passengers are never grumpy. they have a look of eagerness- whether going to the office or going home. such a wonderful crowd sydney has.

i miss going to resto bars, alone or with company. you really feel safe. once inside an establishment, you know that you are in good hands. services are impeccable and the staff solicitous. there is a place where we want to have coffee 24/7. the shop is near a fountain. i've learned to appreciate drinking good coffee here same as i love to have morning and afternoon tea. tea drinking which is taken seriously was taught by good friends. how it is taken, the proper way to do it and the best pastry or baked product that goes with it. how i miss it. but i have to contend with reliving it on my mind so with the places we frequently visit. miss going to moore park where the bars are always full. so with hearing mass at st canice or at the st mary's cathedral. spending day off at darling harbor or the royal botanical gardens. relaxing at the steps of the opera house, watching the world go by. ogling half naked people at bondi beach and watsons bay. eating fish and chips in the park, having lunch at a street cafe in oxford st., betting with my hubby who is gay or not. participating and having a blast during an annual gay and lesbian mardi gras, spending a weekend at blue mountains and in a spur of moment decision to hop in a bus or train and go to brisbane or canberra. sydney is ranked as one of the most expensive cities, but staying for almost five years, i found it cheap and everything is within your reach. food is abundant, amenities are okay, and whatever status you have in life, you are entitled to everything just like the homegrown aussies do.

i know i will be in sydney again or australia for that matter. though i've been to surfer's paradise ,im looking forward of going to the great barrier reef and have my pictures taken at uluru. i like to visit all the churches of south australia and go to dampier,western australia. the hubby has been there a couple of times and thought that it is a nice place to retire. my greatest wish though is to be with the whole family so we will all enjoy what sydney has to offer.

yes russel, i am still alive

this is an answer to the query of one of my favorite niece, russel. she wants me to update my blogsite. it has been months since my last entry. i am still alive and kicking but i am not inspired. my life has lost its lustre and for the first time, i have to admit i am lonely. duh? i miss my hubby very much and burning the wires doesn't compensate the feeling of being alone. i worry about him since the day i've heard about him not feeling 100% okay. we have to rearrange our long term plans and i am still waiting for some news and results to give my schedule another spin.

thanks shell, for sharing some of your innermost thoughts about the aborted lovelife. i will not say(this time) i told you so - i would not even give you a litany. as i've said, i just hope that the culprit(his name is not worth mentioning) and me will not have the chance to cross one's path. or else......i might turn into a bear again protecting her cub.

the poem below is dedicated to my first born. ken, happy happy birthday. you are quarter of a century old already. my good wishes and prayers for you to have all your heart's desire. i fell in love with the poem when i saw the movie in her shoes. it was read by cameron diaz's character to her sister's wedding. though i am still waiting for you to introduce me to your new girl, i promise myself not to dread the day and just be happy for you. God speed anak and enjoy your day. labshu!

i carry your heart with me (e.e. cummings)

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)